Helpful Questions

            Starting this Sunday our students will hear a new series that encourages them to do something that doesn’t always happen in a church setting.  This new series will encourage students to ask questions about their faith, in a safe manner that will help them shape it as their own.  This series is entitled Doubt and here is a brief series synopsis about series;

“Everyone has moments of doubt. We doubt if we are heading in the right direction when going someplace new. We doubt if that low-fat snack is really as healthy as it claims to be. We doubt if the people in our lives really care about us—even in spite of the evidence that they do. And sometimes our doubts are about God. Can we trust God? Does God really have our best in mind? What does a particular Bible verse actually mean?

When questions arise, they can be a little unsettling, especially questions about faith. But what if God was big enough to handle the questions? He is. What if God was secure enough to handle our uncertainty? He is. And what if doubt actually paved the way to a deeper belief, a stronger relationship with Christ? It can.”

As a teenager I remember feeling uncomfortable asking questions about my faith.  Each week I would go to church, sing the songs, listen to the sermons and go home thinking about how nice that was.  I recall never really wrestling with anything the pastor would preach on or thinking about it a great deal.  I found myself thumbing through my Bible and reading the words without making a real connection to my heart.  I found myself stuck in this rut for the majority of my life, but that wasn’t what God had in store for me.

At the age of sixteen things began to change in how I thought about the sermons I heard, the songs we sang, and the passages I was reading in my Bible.  I began to think through them more intently and realized that there were several things that simply didn’t seem to make sense to me.  I found myself asking my youth pastor and pastor about different things in the Bible almost weekly.  I began to get some sort of answers to my questions however, the questions continued as I learned more about Christianity and particularly what that means to me in college. 

I found myself at a private Christian college where my fellow students and professors were all wrestling with what it means to be a Christian.  What was this relationship that God invited us into really all about?  During these four years I found myself digging deeper into the questions of Christianity and finding some sense of resolution in my heart to these questions.  However, what I realized through this process were two things; first, I began to understand that asking questions is a good thing because it creates tension and not all tension is bad.  In fact the tension that was created from the questions caused us to dig through the Bible and various other books/resources to come to conclusion about our questions.  This leads directly into the second thing that I discovered through asking questions which is the fact that I found myself connecting with God in a more personal way than ever before.  The intent searching for answers allowed us to grow in our faith and really establish a personal relationship with God that was “ours” and not simply something that was passed on from the church or our parents.

Questions are not a negative thing; in fact it is how we learn.  I have discovered this with my two small children who ask the question, “Why?” to almost everything.  My challenge to you is to ask the tough questions about your faith, search for answers, and talk about your findings with your family.  This will not only bring you closer together as a family but it will also help to strengthen your own personal relationship with God.

Is Being a Christian Messy?

          I recently heard a wonderful story that I wanted to share with you today.  I recently had the opportunity to attend a one day training event and the primary speaker shared a story that resonated with my soul and should with everyone who is a parent, as well. 

Here is his story:

            “Every year at Christmas I find myself waiting until Christmas Eve to do my shopping for everyone.  There is something that is just therapeutic to me about waiting and shopping on the last possible day for those special gifts.  My tradition has always been to wake up early and travel to my favorite shopping mall to purchase those special gifts for my loved ones.  However, one particular Christmas Eve, my entire perspective was altered. 

          I woke up that day and traveled to the mall ready to embark on my journey however, I knew I needed to stop by the restroom to make sure I was ready for a full day of shopping.  After coming out of the restroom I noticed an elderly lady standing extremely close to the men’s restroom door almost seeking to see inside every time that the door was opened.  I went out of my comfort zone as an introvert and asked her if everything was alright.  Her reply was simply, ‘My husband went in there a while ago and hasn’t come out.”  I questioned her reasoning but I said ‘Alright, how long has he been in there?’  Her reply raised my level of concern instantly when she said ‘He’s been in there for 45 minutes.’  I told her to wait there and I would go to check on her husband, which was going to be another challenging moment for me.  I walked into the bathroom and found myself knocking on each stall door asking, ‘Frank, are you in there?’  Finally when I reached the last stall I heard a faint whisper before I asked the question.  The voice said, ‘Yes, I’m Frank and I’m in here.’  I asked if everything was alright and responded with a simple, ‘No.’  At this point my heart was beating so loudly I was sure everyone else in the bathroom could hear it but I mustered up the courage to ask the question, ‘What’s wrong?’  The faint voice replied, ‘I had an accident.’  My heart sank as I asked, ‘Do you want me to come in and help you?’ all the while praying that he would say no.  Frank quietly said, ‘Yes, please.’  I tried to compose myself and walked into the stall with Frank who sat there covered in his own mess from head to toe.  He told me that on his way to the stall he had an accident and then slipped and fell in the mess which left him in this embarrassed and fragile state. 
          I returned out to his wife and told her that she needed to go and buy him some new clothes and returned to the bathroom to help this 80 year old man.  I found myself walking back and forth from the sink to the stall with damp paper towels in hand seeking to help Frank get cleaned up.  After working with him for several minutes, gathering the new clothes from his wife, he was cleaned up and able to leave the bathroom.  I walked out with him and watched he and his wife leave the mall.  I found myself struggling with the entire encounter as I now found myself walking through the mall at a rapid pace arguing with God about this “distraction” in my planned day and then it happened.
          At one sudden moment it became so clear to me, why this had happened.  I felt like God was nudging my heart saying, ‘There is no way for you to do what you do without getting messy, just like there was no way for Jesus to do what He did without getting messy.’  At that moment my entire world stopped as I began to think about my family, the ministry I called to lead, and the various situations that I had found myself in through the years.  I realized that this central truth is central to everything that I do.”
 

As I personally listened to these words, I thought about several of the same things in my own life.  Often times I may find myself frustrated when my children don’t listen, when things go a different route than I expected in the ministry, or when something completely deters me from completing what I thought I knew.  However, these words should resonate with our hearts because we often times have a beautiful picture of what Jesus did on the cross for us.  We believe that it was peaceful and calm just like many of the pictures that we see and display in our homes.  However, the death of Jesus on the cross so we could each have eternal life in heaven was a messy thing.  It was a horrible thing and just like this speaker mentioned there are times in our lives where we find ourselves in the midst of a “mess.”  Perhaps you are in the midst of a mess right now with your marriage, children, a situation at work, or some other situation and if that is the case I want to offer you hope.  There is no way to truly succeed in your marriage, raising children, or clinging to your integrity at work without getting messy.  It’s a part of life that we all find ourselves trudging through, however have you ever thought about the mess that Jesus endured for you?  Have you ever stopped to think about the fact that just because you are in a mess doesn’t mean that you are doing it wrong but maybe that God can trust you with the mess? 

I offer you hope today in the form of a personal relationship with Jesus Christ despite the mess that you may find yourself in.  Cling to the mess that Jesus lived through on the cross for you, knowing that His mess gives you eternal life and trust in a God who is bigger than your situation.

Do Others See Jesus in You?

          This past week our students completed the series, The Invisibles.  This series examines the challenges that many of us have faced with feeling invisible at certain points of our lives, seeing others who may be invisible to us right now, and gaining an understanding that we have never been invisible to God.  Each week includes a discussion question/point that our parents and their students are encouraged to wrestle through together.  The final week’s discussion question reads as follows, “Identify someone who is invisible in each of your worlds.  What does he or she need?  How can you help with that need?  How can you also point them to Christ?”

Throughout this series we have been challenging our students to examine the world they live in by looking at their families, schools, communities, and the whole world.  This past week we discussed how they could be “like Jesus” to both “the invisibles” around them and also to anyone that they served.  For our family this became extremely evident through an experience we shared with our Sunday School class in Georgia.  Our class was very intentional about seeking out opportunities to help others in need throughout the year.  One particular opportunity that came up was to travel to “Tent City” (a place of shelter for several homeless people in the area) and serve them dinner.  Mindy and I felt compelled not only to serve at this event but also to have our children participate with us.  Our children were only two and three at the time so we knew that they would not grasp the full meaning of what they were doing but that it would be a good starting point to introduce them to a life of serving others.  That evening we were able to help several people by providing them with a hot meal, conversation, and even some special kits with various items in them like toothpaste, hand sanitizer, and other items that they would need (which were specially prepared by our own children prior to the evening of serving).  This was simply one way of noticing people that were in our line of sight everyday but invisible to us prior to this evening.  After leaving that night our son began asking several questions about why those people didn’t have a house or food which led to some challenging conversation with him.  However, we believe as parents that starting our children early in serving others will hopefully help them have this attitude through the remainder of their lives. 

As parents, what opportunities are presenting your children with to serve others?  What opportunities are available for you to serve as a family?  I challenge you not only to think about the immediate community that you find yourself in but also the larger community that we are all a part of being the world. 

This week we were able to challenge our students to take on a different perspective as they prepared for our annual summer mission experiences.  We challenged them to think about the reason that they were serving (being the hands and feet of Jesus Christ) along with ways that they could show God’s love to other people in another part of the country.  The challenge was well received as our students began to think of ways they could impact other areas of our nation with the love of Christ in a more intentional manner.  One small group leader mentioned the great work that our students had done in this area during our trip to Steubenville, Ohio this past year.  He mentioned that one person whose house they worked on commented about the hope that she had now because of the heart of the students who helped her during the week.  This is a testament to the wonderful work of our students, adults, and church as we seek to share God’s love with other people.  I am thankful for an opportunity to be a part of this wonderful church that seeks to share God’s love with other people!

Again, my challenge to you is to seek out opportunities to serve others as a family both in your immediate community and the world.

Are They Just in the Background?

This past week our students continued in their series, The Invisibles.  This series examines the challenges that many of us have faced with feeling invisible at certain points of our lives, seeing others who may be invisible to us right now, and gaining an understanding that we have never been invisible to God.  Each week includes a discussion question/point that our parents and their students are encouraged to wrestle through together.  The second week’s discussion question reads as follows, “Who are some people that are consistently in the background scenery of your everyday life?”

Every day there are people who we walk past, bump into, or drive by in our cars who are invisible to us.  In my life I can think of several people who I have consistently put in the background of my life.  These were people who had a story to tell and life to share but for whatever reason I simply went past them without a second thought in my mind. 

However, there was one individual who stands out as the turning point for me noticing people that were in the background scenery of my life.  Before we moved to Ohio we were serving a church in Georgia and to get almost anywhere you had to take the interstate.  Every day we would get on and off the ramps to go to our house always seeing the same homeless man standing on the side of the road asking for money.  For several days we drove by ignoring him completely for whatever reason.  I recall using our children (who were two and three years old at the time), the face that we were running late, or several other reasons to drive by and ignore him.  However, one day our lives changed as my wife told me that she knew we needed to stop and help him.  We found ourselves going to the gas station buying him a sandwich and drink and getting a few dollars out of the ATM.  We drove back to him and dropped off the various items and started a discussion with him.  I remember that I didn’t catch his name or really anything about his story because I was so floored that he didn’t ask what kind of sandwich it was or what we got him to drink.  I found myself mulling over the idea that if I were in his position I would want to know the answers to those questions and then it happened.  I started wrestling with my own selfish feelings and realized that if I was in his situation I wouldn’t care what it was either but would rather be thankful for the gift of any passerby.  I realized that own my own selfish feelings were dictating the way that I was handling this situation and I have to admit that I felt more than a little embarrassed.  I realized that for several days we drove by this man simply because he was a part of the background scenery of our lives.  I have to admit that this act was initiated and carried out by my wife, but it caused me to start looking beyond my own little world.

A second occurrence of noticing those in the background scenery of our lives happened a few years ago when we were listening to a friend of ours deliver a sermon series from The Advent Conspiracy.  After hearing his words, we found ourselves revaluating our approach to Christmas.  We realized that there were several other people around the world who were so much worse off than we were and God grabbed our hearts to look for more ways to be involved in missions.  This wasn’t a guilt-trip series but rather a way for us to look at the impact that our small family could make in so-much-larger world.  This year during our advent season our students will be diving into this study with the opportunity to make an impact on the world.  You can find more information about this series by watching the video below.

So who are the people in the background scenery of your life?  Who are the people that you walk or drive by daily that simply need you to reach out?  As Christians, we should be the best at reaching out to others with the love of Christ, but we often times fall flat or falter with this.  What steps can you take today to start to remedy this situation in your own life?  Maybe it is simply giving a little money to someone in need or partnering with a charity/organization around the world to impact the life of someone else.

Can You See Me?

This week our students started a new series, The Invisibles.  This series examines the challenges that many of us have faced with feeling invisible at certain points of our lives, seeing others who may be invisible to us right now, and gaining an understanding that we have never been invisible to God.  Each week includes a discussion question/point that our parents and their students are encouraged to wrestle through together.  The first week’s discussion point reads as follows, “Describe a time when you felt invisible.”

Invisibility has often times been a power that superheroes possesses that has intrigued me.  I have thought about the possibilities of observing things without anyone knowing you are there, being able to remove yourself from a tense situation without anyone knowing, and several other interesting things.  However, I found in my life, the fact to be true that you don’t have to be a superhero to have the power of invisibility.  In fact, many people walking around today have this very power as they walk by us without really connecting to us or in fact to anyone.

I think if we examined our lives there have been times that we all have felt invisible.  There have been those times that we walked into a new place and desired a connection only to see others moving busily through their routines and completely ignoring us.  There are probably times when we have wished for someone to come up and talk to us but deep down were afraid that someone would because that would mean that we would actually have to talk to them.  Personally, I think that our culture has made us so accustomed to feeling invisible, overlooked, or left out that we are immune to really noticing it anymore.  But what happens to us when someone does reach out and connect with us?  What happens when someone notices that we are not invisible but rather that we have a unique and special story to tell?  What happens when someone looks at our heart rather than passes a quick glance our direction?

For me there is one story that I shared with our students this past week of an opportunity that presented itself for me to take notice of someone else and listen to his story.  A few years ago, I was serving with a group of students and adults at a homeless shelter in West Virginia as a part of a mission trip experience.  After our time of serving it was time for us to leave and head back to the church where we were staying, however I noticed a young man out of the corner of my eye who struck me as someone who needed something else.  I could have left with our group and missed out on his story but something (rather Someone, meaning God) made me stay.  I found myself wondering over to the bed beside him and sat down across from him.  Upon doing so we made small talk about his situation, family, and life.  I found myself almost in tears as he shared about an illness he had that caused his family to leave him, which include three beautiful children.  I listened to his story about how he was out of work, how he had served our country faithfully in the army, and so much more about his struggles.  Throughout the conversation, I found myself crying with him as he shared his hurt so openly and honestly.  This young man had been invisible for so long to so many people, that my heart just broke thinking about the hardships that he had endured.  Without really thinking about it, I started to share about my faith and asked Jeremy if he would like to know more about a God who loves him and wants a relationship with him?  He looked at me with tears in his eyes and said “YES!”  I grabbed a couple of other adults and we started praying for Jeremy right then and there.  After we finished he looked up at me with tears in his eyes and simply said “Thank you.”  We made several offers to him to reconnect with us while we were there and he said he would be alright.  As I went to bed that night I realized that God had seen Jeremy all along and he was never truly invisible to others even though he thought he was.  The next morning Jeremy showed up at the church we were staying at which proved to be a wonderful connection for him as he served alongside of us, began worshipping there, and eventually got a job helping him get back on his feet.  I lost touch with Jeremy after our time together but I often times find myself thinking of him and praying for him wherever he is.  I wonder how my life would have been different if I hadn’t stopped to listen to his story while seeking to connecting him to God’s Story.

When is a time in your life you have felt invisible?  I’m sure that many of us can share stories of our own personal hurt and pain when we were overlooked but what about the times we overlook others?  My challenge to you this week is to find someone who may be invisible to others, and simply take time to listen to their story.

 

 

 

You Expect Me To Do What!

          This past week our students finished up the Rhythm series that they have worked through this past month.  Each week includes a discussion question that our parents and their students are encouraged to wrestle through together.  The fourth week’s question read as follows, “No person can have a life in rhythm if they are not at peace with the people around them. In the final week of this series students will be challenged to be in rhythm with others, to be passionate about serving those they encounter and to seek forgiveness and reconciliation when needed. How can you work at making this a regular practice in your family?”

Tension is one of those things that we often feel uncomfortable with and try to remedy as quickly as possible.  However, have you ever stopped to think of tension as a good thing?  For me, the need to view tension in a new light started when I started searching the Scriptures, asking challenging questions, and seeking to make my faith my own in college.  I realized that the tension I was feeling wasn’t a negative thing but rather something that was positive because it was causing me to search out who God really is and how that directly affected my life.  Asking challenging questions sometimes actually deters us from spiritual growth, as we are too afraid to ask these questions for the fear that we may be met with ridicule or laughter or even worse a phrase that offers little closure, “I don’t know the answer to that question.”  What would happen if we started asking challenging questions that we may not have the answer to but would cause us to search the Bible, pray for answer, and seek the solution together?  Is all tension bad not at all, in fact it may be one of the largest sources of our spiritual growth.

With that being said, our youth ministry experienced a healthy dose of tension this past week, based on the following story.  I shared about the summer between my sophomore and junior year of high school when I was dating a young lady who happened to be a pastor’s daughter.  Growing up in a small church I found myself going to a larger church for youth group as we only had a couple of students in our small church.  One of the other students who drew me into this other youth group was my girlfriend at the time.  Shortly after I started attending there, which led me to church camp for the first time where I accepted my call to ministry, I found our relationship slipping away which led to eventual heartache in my life as she broke-up with me.  While this was a challenging time for me several of my friends and especially my youth pastor reached out to me to stay involved in the program.  I decided to stick around knowing that I would probably see my ex-girlfriend weekly.  She actually stopped coming to youth group for a while and I remember feeling relief from the situation.  However, a few months later she came back and because of her amazing singing voice our youth pastor allowed her to lead our youth worship team!  I remember feeling so frustrated that he would allow her to lead after the way that she hurt me and then I stumbled across a powerful Scripture that made me take a second look at the situation.  

That Scripture was Matthew 5:21-24 which says, “You have heard that it was said to our ancestors, Do Not Murder, and whoever murders will be subject to judgment.  But I tell you, everyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment.  And whoever says to his brother, ‘Fool!’ will be subject to the Sanhedrin.  But whoever says, ‘You moron!’ will be subject to hellfire.  So if you are offering your gift on the alter and there you remember that your brother has something against you, leave your fit there in front of the alter.  First go and be reconciled with your brother, and then come and offer your gift.” (HSCB)

As I thought about this passage I realized that the problem was not with her but with me.  I needed to seek to forgive her and move on with my life but this was a challenge.  However, with time things began to get better as we decided to seek “reconciliation” for the sake of our own spiritual journeys.

As you read this maybe there is someone that you need to seek reconciliation from.  Maybe there is something that you need to forgive for something that happened in your life, even if it was years ago.  If that is the case for you my prayer is that you will allow the healthy dose of tension in your life to be a reason to move you to reconciliation and/or forgiveness.